Thursday, August 19, 2010

Socialized to Adulthood

Hunter with my father-in-law, whose side he was glued to for a week
"One of the great modern myths is that children need other children to become 'socialized.' The exact opposite is true. The notion that little children learn how to be civilized from being with each other has little to recommend it. What can a three-year-old teach another three-year-old? Answer: How to behave like a three-year-old." 
-Glenn Doman
Hunter likes adults.

And, in fact, as far as I've seen, he prefers adults to other little children.

Whenever there's another adult in our house, whether it's a visiting relative, a friend come by for dinner, a maintenance man, or a visitor from the office, Hunter tends to flock to them like moths to a street light. He will show off his books or toys or latest invention or drawing, chit-chatting incessantly, often to the point of us having to send him off to give our guest a break from his undivided attention.

Sure, he likes other kids.

He always enjoys leaving mom behind and running around the neighborhood when all his friends get out of school. He has buddies that he looks forward to going over to their house. He has thoroughly enjoyed going to vacation bible school, going to kids programs at the youth center, making friends at the pool, and the list goes on.

But what really caught my attention today is that, Hunter likes and prefers, one-on-one time with adults.

And isn't that the way it should be?

After all, that is what he is learning to be, right?

When I think about my choice to homeschool him, and I think about all the innocently ignorant parents out there badgering me about the infamous What-about-socialization question, I kindly say, thanks but no thanks.

Because I really don't have a lot of faith in a herd of five year olds teaching my son too much about how to be a man. 

I would rather have Hunter learning from those whom he is trying to grow into (an adult), not those whom he is trying to grow out of (a five year old). 

Does it go against the status quo?

Of course.

But I'm used to that by now.

"My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways." 
Proverbs 23:26

Hunter is 5 years, 5 months old


  1. My almost 5 year old prefers adults, too. Great perspective!

  2. finally someone that sees things as I do, I´m homeschooling a 2,5 and a 15 month baby, so....not really homeschooling as they are not in the age to homeschool, but event so I get the same critics, "the child neeeeeds to be with other children" "you are condemning his social life", it gets soooooooo hard at times.
    tanks for sheering


Thank you for your comments!