Hunter's Chores (at almost 6 years old)

Hunter, 5 years 10 months old, taking care
of his personal belongings

I have heard that the amish have a saying that children before seven are (chore wise) a burden, between seven and fourteen they can carry their own weight, and from fourteen on upwards they bring in a profit to the household.

So in other words, a house full of amish seven-year-olds would be able to run self-sufficiently.

Not exactly within the realm of our current cultural expectations. But I think it can serve as a reminder that children, when given the chance, can and do rise to the occasion of responsibility.

Hunter, at 13 months old, "helping" with the dishes

Hunter has "helped" out with anything and everything possible from the time he could sit up by himself. He grew up believing that work was part of life and that he was part of life too, so work has always been second nature to him.

I think that this parenting and educational philosophy has really helped him in developing a strong work ethic, and, at almost six years old, being able to be almost completely self-sufficient as well as a genuinely contributing member of the family.

Hunter at 4 years, 7 months old, vacuuming his room

Since I've found it helpful to see other people's kids' chore lists, I thought I would share what Hunter does around the house at this point in his life:

General Chores 
Checklist type stuff Hunter does on a regular basis

• Clean bedroom weekly
• vacuum floor and closet, 
• dust shelves and windows, 
• organize and straighten bookshelf, closet, drawers
• empty trash can
• Clean own bathroom weekly
• clean and sanitize sink, toilet, mirrors, shower
• sweep and mop floor
• empty trash, clean trash can
• Deep clean bedroom periodically
• declutter
• clean windows, walls, TV, toys, etc.
• Laundry
• sort dirty laundry into dark and light
• often, put family laundry in washer or switch to dryer (he knows how to run the washer and dryer and can do this by himself, but I usually do this with him as he's still learning what can and can't go in the dryer and how to load the washer evenly)
• fold or hang up all of own laundry and put away 
• help fold family laundry, towels, blankets, etc.
• help gather and transport clean or dirty laundry
• change own sheets and bedding
• Empty kitchen trash as needed
• Take trash and recycling to street weekly
• Sweep sidewalks, patio, driveway weekly 
• Check mailbox daily
• Bring in newspaper

Helping prepare dinner, age 4 years 5 months old

Being Part of a Family

Besides his "chores", Hunter helps out around the house whenever and with whatever needed (these are usually some of his favorite things to do)

• Kitchen
• set and clear table
• load and unload dishwasher
• wash dishes for fun
• help prepare food (all the time)
• put leftovers away
• make own meals and snacks
• Carry in and put away groceries, other purchased items
• Help bag items while at the store
• Rake yard
• Help out with desk work 
• cutting, sorting papers, shredding
• Help wash the car
• Help out when mom does deep cleaning
• dusting, washing windows, mopping, vacuuming, etc.
• Help with all projects
• use tools, assemble things, run errands
• Organizing projects
• Basically, anything that we're doing, he's doing too!

Hunter, after a shower, at 4 years 5 months old

Self Care

Personally, I think this stuff goes without saying and isn't necessarily a "chore", but since it's generally on other people's chore lists for younger kids I thought I would include it:

• Hygiene
• shower, brush and floss teeth, comb hair, trim nails, etc.
• Routines
• Make bed, lay out clothes and other items for next day
• Pick up after self
• Keep self organized
• manage calendar, day planner (with help)
• Independent school work
• all school work that he can do independently, such as math practice sheets, reading, penmanship, much more

Hunter, at age 3 years 0 months,
carrying in groceries

His "Employed" Chores
I don't believe in paying kids to contribute to the family, and am not really comfortable with an "allowance", but Hunter has jobs he does to contribute to my home business (part time child care) that he gets paid a small sum for each week.

• Clean up after the kids' meals 
• clear table, put away food, clean entire kitchen
• Clean kids play area daily
• straightening and organizing all toys
• vacuuming carpet
• Clean bathroom used by kids daily
• sanitize sink, toilet, walls, trash can, sweep floor
• Empty diaper pail, take dirty diapers outside as needed
• Help with kids whenever needed
• read stories during circle time
• help with whatever I need assistance with
• Also included on his list is setting a good example, being gentle, focusing on assigned task, etc.

So, there you have it, life in our house right now!

What kind of things do your kids do to help out around the house?

"It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth." 

Lamentations 3:27

Hunter is 5 years, 10 months old

Attention!

For several months now, we have had this fun little game called "attention" where Hunter has learned to exercise self-control, immediate obedience, and attentive listening.

When I say the word, "Attention!" (similar to the way a military drill sergeant would), Hunter immediately does five things (which he memorized in a little chant):

Hands together, feet together, smile, look at me, and say "Yes ma'am!"

It is all done as a fun little game. Anthony, Hunter's two-year-old cousin, knows the rules too, and quickly jumps to attention on command.

We practice this game frequently, just to get them accustomed to always obeying immediately (which is SO important. Think about if a child runs out towards the street, is about to step on something harmful, or a million other situations where it could mean their life if they aren't trained to obey instantly).

And besides being great obedience practice, it is a wonderfully handy habit to have: undivided, respectful, focused attention from your preschooler. I use this little game all the time when I need to give them instructions, tell them what we're about to do, or other things when I need their undivided attention.

The game is over when I say "At ease!" (yes, another little term borrowed from the military). Sometimes I just call them to attention for a few seconds, sometimes I let them practice for a few minutes. It's not always easy for a toddler or preschooler to keep from wiggling, but it is a great way to learn self-control, which I would argue is the root of all other virtue - the ability to say no to what you want to do and yes to what you ought to do. The ability to control yourself, your impulses, and appetites and submit to duty, not just desire.

"Hear attentively the noise of his voice, and the sound that goeth out of his mouth."

Job 37:2

Hunter is 4 years, 2 months old

Motherly Love

I make it a point to look Hunter in the eyes and smile at him many times a day. It's important for me to connect with him, to continually let him know that he has my heart and goodwill, that I am interested in him and love him deeply.

Of course, we demonstrate our love, goodwill, and interest to our children in more ways than one, including our actions, our words, and our attitudes towards them (and around them: they pick up on more than we probably realize). But facial expression is so important. The Bible calls it "countenance". Some of my favorites:

"The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace." (Numbers 6:26) God's countenance gives us peace.

"There be many that say, Who will shew us any good? LORD, lift thou up the light of thy countenance upon us." (Psalm 4:6) God's countenance in us shows the people that there is good in the world.

"For thou hast made him most blessed for ever: thou hast made him exceeding glad with thy countenance." (Psalm 21:6) God's countenance makes us glad - exceedingly glad!

"Why art thou cast down, O my soul?... hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him for the help of his countenance." (Psalm 42:5) God's countenance is our hope and help when we are "cast down" or discouraged.

"Blessed is the people that know the joyful sound: they shall walk, O LORD, in the light of thy countenance. In thy name shall they rejoice all the day: and in thy righteousness shall they be exalted." (Psalm 89:15-16) People who "know the joyful sound" - who are joyful - walk in the light of God's countenance! Not only that, but they rejoice all the day and are exalted in his righteousness!

I love these verses. Reading these and the many others with that word has taught me so much. Even though I'm not always perfect, I try to always have a joyful, loving, interested countenance towards Hunter. If God's countenance is so important to his children, certainly the parent's countenance is important to theirs.

But what made me think of writing about this is Hunter's recent displaying of affection and endearment towards me. Over the last few weeks, he has been very frequently returning the favor of random smiles, kisses, hugs, and kind words of encouragement towards me. He will just walk up to me out of nowhere and give me a big hug, or smile the most precious smile towards me, or tell me that he loves me. Granted, he's certainly not perfect and is not always full of hugs and smiles, but it is so encouraging to see his recent display of not only affection but genuine appreciation for his mother. Being a mother certainly has it's blessings but it is things like these that make each day the most wonderful of days in the world.

"Her children arise up, and call her blessed..."

Proverbs 31:28

Hunter is 4 years, 2 months old

Screaming

Hunter has developed the obnoxious habit of screaming lately. Not screaming because he's throwing a fit or screaming just to hear his own voice, but mostly screaming out of excitement while at play.

I'm realizing that it's my own fault that it has been allowed to become a habit, but no parent is perfect and sometimes (and unfortunately) we don't notice an undesirable trait until it's turned into a problem.

In our house, my mom never let us scream, not even while running around in the backyard. It was more of a safety issue than an issue of parental annoyance, and I understand her reasoning. You see, if my mom was so used to us screaming all the time while playing, how would she know if it was an emergency? She would always ask us (or friends who were playing at our house), "Are you broken or bleeding? No? Than don't scream."

Screaming is a good indication of a medical emergency, but it is also a warning of other emergencies, too. Take abductions, for instance. We tell kids that if someone tries to grab them, then they are supposed to scream and kick and bite, etc. But if adults are so used to kids screaming in play that it doesn't even alarm them, kids have just lost their best line of defense - help.

So, today I've started tackling the habit that I've allowed to form. Earlier I came around the corner and rushed up to tickle Hunter, and he let out a blood-curling scream. I told him, "No, Hunter, we don't scream. Am I a bad guy who is trying to hurt you or take you? No? Well you never scream unless you are in danger and need help. Mommy is not a bad guy, and you do not scream unless you're in trouble."

And that should be the end of that very soon!

"And it came to pass at the seventh time, when the priests blew with the trumpets, Joshua said unto the people, Shout; for the LORD hath given you the city."

Joshua 6:16

Hunter is 4 years, 2 months old